Thursday, December 20, 2007

news? I don't like news

I think our local paper has spent an awful lot of money on their marketing plan. I have been bombarded with phone calls from telemarketers for at least the last year and a half, trying to sell me on getting the paper delivered. I answered a couple of times, but I got tired of it real fast.

My next strategy was to ignore the calls, because they always came from the same number. Where the heck do 505 area-code phone numbers come from anyway? They certainly are not local for here. Did they hire a bunch of farm kids from South Dakota to make these calls? Anyway, ignoring the calls really hasn't helped because they just keep on calling, and they always call at the oddest times of the day, hoping, I suppose, to catch someone at home. They even call me at my work number. I've always ignored it there once I figured out how to tell who it was.

Tonight, though, I couldn't resist it. I had to answer. I was trying to finish listening to my online class lecture, but I was getting TWITCHY! And for those of you who know me well enough, that is not a good state for me to be in. All that twitchiness is usually followed by too much crabbiness.

I answered the phone. And yes, it was one of he faithful newspaper marketers. I listened to his short shpiel, and then said (most unoriginally), "Oh, I'm not really interested.

He was good, though. He didn't give up. He asked, "Well, ma'am, how do you get your news, then?"

"I don't," I said flatly. Dead silence.

It took him a minute, but then he asked hesitantly, "Well, how do you find out about what's going on in your community, ma'am?"

I said, "I don't."

Silence, then, "I beg your pardon?" He sounded a little nervous.

"I don't want to know what's going on. It's too depressing. It makes me want to jump off a bridge."

There was another long pause. "Well, ma'am," he said valiantly, "the paper has other things besides bad news. There are ways to save money with coupons and things."

I should have said, "I don't like to save money," but I couldn't do it anymore without cracking up. I just said, "Oh, no. I don't think so."

Dead silence. I could almost see him going through his list of objections and his prepared responses. He gave up. "Okay, thank you, ma'am. Well, if you ever want to contact us, the number is... ...and have a merry Christmas." He clicked off without waiting for a response.

That was so much more fun than ignoring the phone!

1 comment:

daisymarie said...

i couldn't have done it...i would have cracked myself up. i had one of those opion survey things call the other night and i took the call---right after i had just gotten a bowl of ice cream. i barely had a milk shake when they were done with me...grrrrrrrrr.