Wednesday, July 2, 2014

i had this dream...

I had a dream about church recently...I dreamed that I was a kid, and I was given a paper lunch sack to carry.  The top was all scrunched over and folded down, and there were things written on the outside of the sack.  There was a picture of a Bible in the sack and some other things, but I didn't know what those were. It was dark in there, and even if I stood under the light, there was not enough light to see.

In this dream, my mother and father gave me this paper sack.  I had to take good care of it.  They told me to carry the sack with me everywhere I went, and that everything I needed to know was written on the outside of the sack.  They said the beautiful thing was that it would never change, that everything I had to do and everything I had to know was written there.

Everyone in my family was a sack-carrier.  Well, mostly.  My dad's family did not carry sacks, so we never went to their houses or talked to them. Or knew them.  Even when they died, we did not go to their funerals.  We only went to the funerals of sack-carriers.

The first thing that was written on the sack was that I couldn't put it down.  I had to let everyone see that I was carrying this beat up old scrunchy lunch sack, too.  I couldn't put it in a backpack or shove it in a box.  It had to be out there, a permanent accessory.  I had to carry it everywhere--to school, to the store, when I went to play with my friends...even when I went to sleep.

If I ever put it down, something terrible could happen.  In fact, I might not even be able to find it when I was ready to pick it up again.  My mother always told me if I set the sack down and I died before I could pick it up again, there would be no second chances to pick the sack back up.  It was final and I would meet a terrible end.  I was terrified that I would lose my sack somewhere when I wasn't careful, and sometimes at night I couldn't fall asleep because I had to keep checking to see if my sack was next to me.

Another thing that was written on the sack was that I could look inside, but I could not change anything in the sack.  In fact, it was better not to question anything in the sack because it was almost as bad as setting the sack down.  People would think I was disloyal to the sack and maybe they would act as if I weren't carrying the sack, even if I was.

If I broke the rules on the sack, I got in trouble and had to say I was sorry for what I did, even if I didn't understand the rules or know why it was wrong.  I didn't get to ask questions about the rules or wonder why the rules were there.  That was against the rules, too.

Every Sunday, we had to take our sacks and go meet with the other sack-carriers to hear about how hard it was to carry these sacks, and how we had to just trust that we would be given the strength to carry our sacks another day.

If people made fun of me for carrying the sack, that was just part of what came with carrying the sack.  The sack would remind me of all the things I could not do.  In school, when people were doing things that I couldn't do, I should try to go somewhere else, but if I couldn't, I should just look at the sack to help me remember what I had to do.  Having the sack would save me; it would carry me through any situation.

People were always checking to see if everyone else was carrying their sack.  If you got caught out in public without your sack, people would make note of it.  Then they would come make sure that you knew you should have been carrying your sack, and they often wouldn't leave until you said you were sorry and you picked up your sack again.  If you didn't, then they made sure everyone knew that you were not a sack-carrier anymore.  Even if you changed your mind and started carrying the sack again, you had to tell someone that you wanted to carry your sack again before they would acknowledge you as a sack-carrier.  You couldn't just show up with your sack on Sunday.  That would not do.

I did not get to change the writing on the sack.  Sometimes the writing on the sack changed, but only when people (certain men in the church) allowed it.  This was called being led by the spirit.  Only certain men were led by the spirit, and never women or children.

I couldn't break the rules on the sack while I was holding the sack because if I did, my mother said the sack would disappear, and I might not be able to find it again.  If I wanted to go into a movie theater, for example, which was on the list of rules -- one of the things I should not do-- the sack would not go in there with me.  I would have to go in alone.

I never got to understand what was in the sack, and when I did try to make sense of it, people would shake their heads and say it was better to carry the sack without questioning it because only God could understand it all.  Even though the men in the church had put it all together and the men made all the rules, they still said that God did it all.  It took me around in one big circle, where the end was the beginning, and the beginning came from the end.

I woke up before my dream ended, but I have made my own ending.  I looked in the sack and found it to be full of sticks and rocks that people use to hurt each other with.  There was no substance, nothing that made sense.  I took it to the beach, dumped the rocks and sticks out on the sand, crumpled up the bag, and threw it away.  I am now walking, sack-free; my mind is clear, my burden is light and my heart is happy.

Wednesday, June 4, 2014

add me to the people who rant about Amazon

It's probably my own fault.  I decided to trade in a textbook to Amazon.  I should have known better.

To make a long story shorter, when you trade books in, they give you a shipping label and you slap it on your package and UPS it out of town.  They get it, and you get credit you can spend on Amazon.  Easy peasy, right?  Well, not so fast...

So I can see from the tracking that my package was received last week.  However, when I look in my account options, it still says it is in transit and has not been received.  I expected to wait a couple of days for that, but my patience has run out.  I'm tired of waiting.  I had no clean patience pants to put on this morning, so on my lunch hour, I set out to get to the bottom of this.

Unfortunately, the deeper I dug, the murkier it got.  All I got out of it was hot and bothered, and a wasted lunch hour.  I;ll let you in on the very enlightening chat conversation here.

You are now connected to Pankaj from

Me:  Can you tell me why my trade in book (TRN-*******-*******) still says not rec'd, but was marked delivered and signed for on 5-30-2014? (5 days ago)

Pankaj:  Hello, my name is Pankaj. I'll be happy to help you.  May have the trade in number please?

Me:  It is listed above ^^

Pankaj:  Please allow me minute or two, while I check this for you.

Me:  sure  [allow you minute or two, Pankaj?  …clearly Pankaj is not working in the US]

Pankaj:  Thanks for waiting. The current status of trade-in is received. Even though tracking says it's been delivered, the receiving merchant may not have started processing your trade-in or marked it as received.

It looks like the merchant has received your submission but is still processing it.
If your submission is accepted by the merchant, Amazon Gift Card funds in the amount of the quoted trade-in value for your item(s) will be automatically deposited in your account within two business days. We cannot send cash or a check for your trade-in.
I will suggest you to please wait for 2 days more, you will be credited with gift card.

Me:  I know that. I just don't understand why it says that the status is "Not received/Still in transit"

Pankaj:  I am sorry as I said it might be possible 5the merchant is still processing it.

Me:  I thought the merchant would take two days to process it and mark it received and then it would be two more days before it gets credited my amazon account. It's very frustrating to have to wait so long.  Who is the merchant? I thought I traded it in to Amazon

Pankaj:  I understand and apologizes for that.

Me:  how can I contact the merchant then?

Pankaj:  If you want I can issue promotional credit for same amount right now?

Me:  What does that mean?

Pankaj:  It will automatically apply on your next purchase for shipped and sold by amazon items only.  It will automatically apply on your next order for shipped and sold by amazon items. If the promo will be issued you will not get gift card.  Please make sure it will not apply on seller item or fulfilled by amazon items.  I understand I am sending a confirmation email to you that you will get the gift card within next 2 business days.

Me:  Who is the merchant? How do I contact them?

 Pankaj:  I am sorry only we can email to merchant.

Me:  Are you referring to the credit from the merchant in the next two days or the promo? Because I am not interested in the promo.  Are you going to email the merchant then?

Pankaj:  I will transfer a form to our gift card team to issue gift card as soon as possible for your trade in.

Me:  Are you going to contact the merchant?

Pankaj:  Yes.

Me:  How will I know what you find out from the merchant?

Pankaj:  You need not worry about it, I can send you a confirmation email regarding this.  Once the gift card will be issued, we will send you a confirmation email. [I “need not worry” about it???  Don't patronize me.  And your credibility is falling faster than the barometer in a typhoon.]

Me:  I am worried about it. This is not going the way Amazon says it will happen. Amazon does not say that the merchant can take an undetermined amount of time to mark the package received before the credit is issued, but that is what seems to be happening here. I am not trying to be unreasonable. I appreciate your help, but when you say that you will tell your gift card team to issue it as soon as possible, that does not reassure me because Amazon already said that, and it is not happening. This is not okay. I still don't have a timeline I can count on, even though my package was delivered five days ago. Five days.

Pankaj:  Some times it may take 5-8 days to process and thanks for understanding. I am really sorry for this inconvenience you experienced.  I am forwarding your comments to our concern team and they will work on this.  I assure you it will never happen again.

Me:  I appreciate the information but I am still not happy. This was a waste of my time. I've spent half an hour with you and nothing has changed, I have no guarantee that it will change, and in fact you are telling me that it could be another 3 to 5 days MORE before I see a credit, and I can't even contact the merchant to ask them about my package. This is not okay.  I appreciate your kindness but your reassurance does nothing to increase my confidence.

Pankaj:  I am sorry for this, please tell me what I can do right now for this? [Here, my eyes bug out, and I start practicing my deep breathing technique to stay calm.]

Me:  Why can't you issue me a non-promo credit now?  You can clearly see that it was received.  Why are you only offering me a promo credit?

Pankaj:  I love to do that for you but I am unable to issue gift card. If you want I can transfer you to my Supervisor. We can only issue promotional credit.

Me:  What could your supervisor offer that you cannot? You already know what I want, and you have told me I can't have it. I can't have the contact information for the merchant. You can't give me the credit. And you can't tell me when the book will be marked received or when I will be issued a credit for the trade-in.

Pankaj:  You will get credit within 2 business days.

Me:  Can your supervisor do any of those things? If so, then yes, please transfer me. If not, then no. I do not want to be transferred.

Pankaj:  Let me transfer this for better help.  Please wait.
Your chat is being transferred now, Thanks for your patience.

Pankaj from is online
A Customer Service Associate will be with you in a moment.
You are now connected to Danish from

Danish:  Hello, my name is Danish. I am a member of leadership team here at [“Danish”???  I’m chatting with "Danish" now?   I’m LOL now because I immediately thought of Phoebe giving Rachel a massage as “Ikea”, the Swedish masseuse.  Danish.  My eye.]

Me:    hello

Danish:  I am sorry to know that you have not received a credit for trade in.

I can see we received your trade in on May 30th. I will suggest you to wait till 6th June.  We can't apply a gift card until this time frame is passed.  [My Rage-O-Meter has just gone from 0 to 90 in two seconds flat.  Before I was just annoyed.  Now I've gone over the cliff.]

Me:  You're kidding me, right? Pankaj already suggested that.  She transferred me here so you could tell me the same thing???

Danish:  I can understand he offered you a promotion credit however it will take 3-5 business days (after sending to gift card team).  [Pankaj is a HE???]

Me:  I do NOT want a promotion credit. Do NOT issue promo credit. This is an incredible waste of time.

I have nothing further to say here. Good day.

Danish from is online.

Thursday, May 15, 2014

wordle, anyone?

I found a lovely toy called wordle.  All my writing here can be distilled down to this, apparently.  It even pulled in the right colors.  Give it a try...the instructions are there. You can add the text you want or use the URL of a blog that has an RSS feed.  You can click on the "Randomize" button to randomly change the color, size and style of the font.  Keep clicking until you find one you like.

Monday, March 31, 2014

cats and more cats, and a dog...

It's official.  I've turned into a cat lady.  The kittens are my babies.

My hubby: The cats are on the counter!
Me: Oh, I didn't even notice. (They are right in front of me.)

I come home from work, put down my bags, and pet all of the cats and the dog before taking another step.

My hubby: Maybe if I had more fur and walked around on four legs, you would come give me some attention.

I laugh.  He's so funny.

I can completely relate to these comics.  You can find more of them at cat versus human, if you like them.

Tuesday, March 11, 2014

wah, wah, wah...

I'm so disappointed...I filled my little thermos jug with the most wonderful coffee this morning: Starbucks Tribute Blend coffee with just the right amount of cream--have you tried it?!  It's like a smooth slice of heaven in a cup.  I know, I mix my metaphors quite frequently.  You'll get used to it.  LOL.  But if you tried it, I bet you would agree with me, without any more thought to my metaphors at all. 

Getting it in the thermos was all good and fine.  However, I left said thermos on the kitchen counter, and all I can do at work this morning is think longingly of my delicious coffee, SITTING AT HOME!  It makes me sad.

I might have to buy another bag of beans on the way home.  It is a seasonal coffee, after all, and it's only here for a limited time each year.  Scoop it up quick before it's gone!